Why I Ditched My To-Do List for a Done List (And Never Looked Back)
At the start of this year, after a solid year in therapy (gold star for self-work!), I made small but meaningful changes to reclaim my authentic self. One of the most significant shifts was untangling my self-worth from my work identity. Somewhere along the way, I had absorbed the capitalist idea that productivity equals value, and I had been living by my to-do lists like they were sacred texts.
Every night, I’d plan my tasks for the next day. Every morning, I’d wake up and try to power through them. And yet, no matter how much I accomplished, I’d often end the day feeling like I hadn’t done enough. The unchecked boxes haunted me, whispering, “You could have done more.” (Rude.)
Then, I made a slight but transformative shift: I started keeping a done list. Instead of focusing on what was left undone, I documented what I had achieved—no matter how small. And because I can’t just casually start a new habit, I took it to the next level. I moved from a handwritten list to a Google Sheet, color-coded my emotions, and even paired my daily accomplishments with affirmations. (Yes, I am a nerd. No, I have no regrets.)
The idea first came from a book my colleague recommended: Meditations for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman. (Thank you, Kelsey!) If you, too, are looking for a way to achieve more balance (and a little less existential dread) in your life, I highly recommend it.
What Is a Done List?
“If you can give up the impossible quest to pay off your productivity debt, and instead start thinking of each day as an opportunity to move a small-but-meaningful set of items over to your done list, you’ll find yourself making better choices about what to focus on.”
A done list is precisely what it sounds like—a record of what got done instead of a wishlist of what should have happened. It swaps out the pressure of a never-ending to-do list for a much-needed reality check: Hey, you did things today!
I still have plenty of commitments and priorities to juggle (because of life), but instead of measuring my worth by the things I didn’t get to, I now wrap up each day by looking at what I did accomplish. And let me tell you, it feels a lot better than staring at unchecked boxes and questioning my entire existence.
Why It Works
It Reframes Success
A to-do list is a pile of good intentions—an optimistic guess at what future-me might get done. But let’s be real: life is messy. Priorities shift, fires pop up, and by noon, the thing that felt urgent in the morning might not even matter anymore.
Take parenting, for example. I might plan to have a wholesome, screen-free evening where we cook a
Pinterest-worthy dinner together. But by 6 PM, work has drained me, my kid is negotiating for Chipotle (again), and my patience is only getting cooked. If my to-do list said, “Make a nutritious, homemade dinner,” I’d feel like I failed. But my done list? It says, “Fed child. Avoided meltdown. Kept everyone alive.” That’s a win.The same applies to work and teaching. I may plan to deep-dive into strategy and craft a beautifully designed Figma deck, but instead, I spend the day in back-to-back meetings, helping a teammate problem-solve or handling unexpected fires. A done list shifts the focus from what didn’t happen to what did—and most of the time, what I accomplished was meaningful, even if it wasn’t what I originally planned. It trades perfection for a collection of ordinary moments that add to real progress together.
It’s a Reality Check
Ever ended a long, exhausting day and thought, Wait, what did I even do? Same. Literally every day. A done list helps me track where my time is going.
In teaching, for example, I might plan to get through an entire lecture, but then a discussion takes an unexpected turn, students start asking questions, and suddenly, we’re knee-deep in a debate about the ethics of AI. (I love it, but where did the time go?) Instead of feeling like I “fell behind,” my done list shows me what mattered: I fostered curiosity, guided meaningful engagement, and helped students connect ideas. That’s the real win. It’s helped me take the pressure off, shifting my focus from rigid plans to recognizing big and small accomplishments daily.
It Shifts the Narrative from “Not Enough” to “More Than Enough”
To-do lists have a sneaky way of making you feel like you’re constantly behind. There’s always more to add, and it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you’ll finally “catch up” one day. (Spoiler: you won’t.)
But a done list flips the script. Instead of measuring my day by what I didn’t get to, it helps me see the story of what happened. In parenting, that might mean I didn’t organize my kid’s closet as planned, but I did help with homework, listened to a long-winded story about K-Pop, and remembered to send in the permission slip. Maybe I didn’t finish that big strategic deck in work, but I did progress on an outline, connect with the right stakeholders, and unblock a teammate.
Life unfolds in the messy middle—the space between the plan and the reality, where the real work (and absolute joy) happens. A done list helps me rewrite the story I tell myself at the end of the day, from “I didn’t do enough” to “I showed up, I moved things forward, and that’s more than enough.”
It’s a Confidence Boost
Some days, it feels like I’m just spinning my wheels—busy, yet unsure if I accomplished anything. But when I take a moment to write down even the most minor wins—getting my kid out the door with the lunchbox, helping a student reframe a problem, nudging a project forward by just one step—I can see that my effort wasn’t wasted.
A done list becomes a highlight reel, not just of progress but of presence. It’s proof that even in the chaos, I showed up, I made an impact, and things did move forward. And honestly, that feels way better than staring at unchecked boxes and letting them tell the wrong story about my day.
How to Start Your Done List
Keep it simple
Whether it’s a notebook, a sticky note, or a Google Sheet, keep your done list somewhere easy to access and update throughout the day. The key is consistency—make it a habit rather than an afterthought. If you want to take it further, try adding emotions or energy levels to spot patterns in your cycles. Are specific tasks draining while others leave you feeling energized? Noticing these trends can help you work smarter, not harder. I categorize my wins and pair them with affirmations—partly because I’m a data nerd, but mostly because I’m training myself to practice gratitude. But you do you! The best system is the one that works for you, so experiment until you find a format that feels effortless to maintain.
Include small wins
Productivity isn’t just about significant, flashy milestones—it’s built on the small, everyday actions that keep life moving. Did you finally schedule that workout after weeks of saying you would? That’s a win. Did you drink water consistently instead of realizing at 4 PM that you’ve only survived on caffeine? Huge progress. Did you take a break before hitting full burnout mode? That’s self-awareness in action. Even stepping away from your desk for five minutes instead of sitting for eight hours straight is a micro-act of self-care that deserves recognition. These seemingly small wins add up, reinforcing better habits, prioritizing well-being, and creating momentum for the bigger goals. A done list isn’t just about tracking accomplishments—it’s about acknowledging all the ways you showed up for yourself, no matter how small because those moments keep everything else in motion.
Review weekly
A done list isn’t just a daily practice—it’s also a powerful tool for reflection. At the end of the week, take a moment to look back at everything you accomplished. Patterns will start to emerge: What types of tasks dominate your time? Are you spending too much energy on things that don’t align with your priorities? Where are your most significant wins happening? A weekly review can also help you identify gaps—maybe you’re giving too much time to admin work and not enough to creative thinking, or perhaps you need to set firmer boundaries to protect your focus. This small self-check-in transforms your done list from a simple log into a guide for making more intentional choices moving forward.
Pair it with gratitude
Getting caught in the mindset that work is just an endless series of tasks is easy, but a done list can help shift that perspective. Instead of focusing solely on output, use it to recognize moments of fulfillment—projects you enjoyed, people you helped, or unexpected wins. Did a conversation with a colleague spark a new idea? Did you take a risk that paid off? Did you do something that improved your day (or someone else’s)? By pairing your done list with gratitude, you’re not just tracking progress—you’re training yourself to see the value in the process, not just the result. Over time, this mindset shift can make work feel less like a grind and more like a space for meaningful contribution.
Final Thoughts
“Your mood is defined not by what you did but by what you thought about.”
For years, I let my to-do list define my sense of accomplishment, measuring my days by unchecked boxes rather than the effort and intention behind them. But to-do lists were never meant to be the sole measure of productivity, and honestly, productivity itself is a relic of capitalism that shouldn’t dictate how we spend our time. The idea that our worth is tied to how much we produce daily is outdated at best and harmful at worst.
By shifting to a done list, I’ve reframed what matters—not just ticking off tasks but recognizing where my energy went, what I contributed, and how I showed up. It’s no longer about efficiency for the sake of output but about impact in a way that aligns with what I truly value.
I no longer ask, “What didn’t I get to?” Instead, I ask, “What did I move forward?” And that simple shift—from chasing productivity to acknowledging meaningful progress—has made all the difference.
